Perfect Pivots ↩️
What to do when you don't get into the restaurant you wanted to eat at.
This was from a conversation I had with a friend about where she could go after she tried, and failed, to walk into Polo Bar. If she had texted me earlier, I would have told her how humiliating walking into Polo Bar is — the bouncer usually shuts it down before you can even step foot in the restaurant. I thought of a few alternatives, some similar, some completely different but fun in their own right. It got me thinking about all the restaurants that surround the perpetually packed spots in the city and how much business the former must get from all of the spillage from the latter.
There are a handful of places I always want to eat, but I usually lack the forethought required to eat at them. I’m a believer in the walk in — feeling all anxiety leave your body while you follow a host to the last two open bar seats at 7:30pm on a Friday… well, that’s bliss. But my friends are not fond of being hit with two hour wait times and no backup plan. I’m a good friend, so when I ask my them to take a chance with me, I make sure I have not just one backup plan, but a few, on deck. This column breaks them all down based on a few of the restaurants downtown we’re often trying to get into, plus one in Williamsburg. There are places where you can drink while you wait for a table and ones you’ll be happy to spend the rest of your night at. Next week you'll get an uptown version.
The Four Horsemen
Where you can eat tiny plates (of things like creamy, crunchy leek toast) and drink tiny glasses of wine (lots of it — their wine list is exceptional) in a tiny dining room (part of why it’s so hard to get a seat here).
Wait it out at: Rocka Rolla, a perfect dive bar with lots of places to sit — booths, bar seats, a backyard. It doesn’t get very crowded except on weekends, and even then, not until after 9pm. Rude Mouth, owned by Ava Trilling (who worked at Four Horsemen prior) is also a great spot to hang out while you wait, especially if you’re hungry. You can have really nice cheese and really nice ham with a $10 mini martini. And every Tuesday a different baker sells cake by the slice. You missed mine but maybe I’ll do it again sometime.
Have a similar meal at: Diner! I’m not sure there’s a place truly comparable to Four Horsemen, but I do think Diner has sex appeal, is one of a kind (it’s in a train’s dining car and the servers explain the menu to you while writing each dish directly onto the table with a marker) and makes great food. The buttery burger and its golden brown, creamy french fries plus an anchovy-heavy chicory Caesar salad are a perfect order.
Not the same, but just as good: Leo has very good, stretchy, yeasty pizza pies and seasonal soft serve. If you’re there when they’re swirling the caramel flavor, you should feel very, very lucky. I also like Misipasta’s silky bottarga spaghetti and very vanilla affogato. The mozzarella in carrozza is crispy and decadent, though stuffed with anchovy, so if you don’t like fish, the plate of custardy cheese gougères and prosciutto is a good substitute.
Thai Diner
Constantly slammed, consistently delicious. Nothing will ever compare to the magic that was Uncle Boons, but this room comes pretty close. And it doesn’t hurt that they serve the legendary coconut and roasted peanut ice cream sundae.
Wait it out at: Spring Lounge if you don’t want to walk very far. It can get crowded and a little rowdy but it’s a good place to have one drink. There’s always a guy who has seemingly been there since 10am. I prefer Botanica, though, especially if you get there before 7pm, when the drinks are $6.
Have a similar meal at: Wayla, a very delicious plan B if you’re set on having Thai food and their backyard is adorable. Lovely Day is also a solid, though pretty casual, spot to do that. It feels like eating at a friend (who is very good at cooking)'s house.
Not the same, but just as good: If Thai Diner quoted me a wait time longer than 45 minutes, I would pivot completely to a warm bowl of chewy soba noodles at Cocoron. Or I'd go directly across the street to find seats at Gem Home, which serves my favorite smoked fish salad, vinegary chicory salads and perfectly sized sandwiches on some of the stretchiest, crustiest, most impressive bread in New York made by my friend Mo. It’s available by the loaf too, and also on their new dinner menu, where it's roasted beneath whole chickens, Zuni Café-style. This makes Gem a good backup whether you were originally planning on having khao soi for dinner or the roti-wrapped egg sandwich for breakfast.
Minetta Tavern
A crowded, classic McNally dining room with a perfect queue system — you put your name down with the host, who tells the bartender, who tells you when the seats are yours. You can stand around or sit in the window with drinks while you wait to order the bone marrow and either burger, flirt with the bartender and skip any dessert that’s not a soufflé.
Wait it out at: The Village Tavern for beers and to watch the game. Bandits across the street for Negronis, a shot at sitting in a booth, or a plate of fancy wings to snack on.
Have a similar meal at: You can have another very good burger at Fairfax (it’s the one they used to serve at Bar Sardine). It’s always crowded, but never so much that you can’t get a seat, and everyone working there always seems to be having a lot of fun.
Not the same, but just as good: I would pray for a miracle and try to walk into Dame for bright, silky tuna tartare on golden brown, crunchy, buttered sourdough and whatever fantastic dessert is on the menu. Arancini, cheesy fennel salad and a bowl of pasta at Altro Paradiso never disappoints either. Their cocktails are really fun too, and I love that all of the sorbets and gelatos on the menu come with those gold-wrapped, crispy Gavottes crepe cookies.
Via Carota
Perfect in any capactity. For lunch or for dinner, for rich, buttery pasta and custardy desserts or seasonal salads and spritzes. Inside at the bar or in their semi-private dining room, or at a wobbly table on Grove Street.
Wait it out at: Bar Pisellino, which you probably won’t get into despite their recent expansion into the storefront next door. It’s sad, because drinking any Campari cocktail there really does make you feel like you’re in Milan. (Says me, a woman who has been to Milan once.) A much safer bet is to get drunk on martinis at White Horse Tavern and eat the olives in them as an appetizer.
Have a similar meal at: If I absolutely needed to eat pasta, I’d be brave and try my luck at L’Artusi first, where the pastas are all wonderful but the buttery, flaky housemade crackers and creamy ricotta starter will still probably be the best thing you eat there. If that didn’t work, I’d go to Bar Pitti for a bowl of Rigatoni Pitti (peas and sweet Italian sausage in vodka sauce). Anton’s also has a lovely pasta menu, and if you sit outside on a warm evening, offers prime people watching.
Not the same, but just as good: Walking into Zimmi's successfully isn’t easy, but it’s certainly worth a shot. You could eat pasta here, but you’re better off with the pissaladière, garlicky, green, breadcrumb-covered mussels or giant steak frites. Their cocktail menu is also fabulous. Also French is Buvette, a spot that is Via Carota-level slammed for breakfast but surprisingly laid back for dinner. Still cozy, the mustardy salade de poulet is one of my favorites in the city.
Cervo's
A restaurant that is sexy enough to share prawns and clams and fries and drink cold wine with a date at but also laid back enough to bring a bunch of friends to for piri piri chicken and the lamb burger topped with fat, salty anchovy fillets.
Wait it out at: Ten Bells for wine in a space that is deceivingly large. They serve $20 carafes of house wine before 7pm (they’re still only $26 after that), but they also have some really delicious bottles and by the glass options. I love their online Dropbox menu but I don’t know wine well enough to understand it so I always just ask for what I’m in the mood for. If you can sit outside at Bar Belly, do it. The bar isn’t bad either, but for some reason I always clock really bad first dates happening inside of here. I drank way too much at the bar at Casino a few weeks ago. Expensive but effective!
Have a similar meal at: Bar Pisellino is to Via Carota what Eel Bar is to Cervo’s — designed for spillage. But the former was built as a waiting area, whereas Eel Bar offers a similar dark, seductive dining room and snacky, fish-forward menu, making it a strong pivot for nights when Cervo’s is slammed.
Not the same, but just as good: I don’t know what to tell you guys, Kiki's is one of my favorite restaurants in New York. The mustardy shrimp in their shells, the maroulosalata salad, chicken with lemony potatoes, octopus, 1L carafes of house wine, the cheesecake with what I know isn’t but tastes like a Ritz cracker crust… I could go on. Sidewalk table in the summer is the move. I’d also check out Bar Oliver for a Spanish tortilla and steak. Dessert and a nightcap at Swan Room after any of these options is strongly recommended.
NEXT TIME ON PERFECT CITY:
The uptown edition of this column. Where to wait for a table at or pivot from Hillstone, Monkey Bar and the new Upper East Side triple threat: Hoexter’s, Cafe Commerce and Chez Fifi.
Really good list! also, the embarrassment of walking into polo bar even WITH a reservation is too real. The pomp and circumstance of it all!
Wayla is a great pick as a backup plan!